I think of the trees and how simply they let go. — May Sarton
When she was ready, she let her worries go like falling leaves; released at last from their long obligation, they danced with the wind as they went. — Scott Kahler
For many of us, our worrying parts work very hard. If asked, these parts might contend that they are helping us — protecting us, even — by keeping us thinking ahead and preparing us for what could happen. Unfortunately, what our worrying parts do for us, and the intensity with which they do it, both frequently come at a cost — to our physical well-being, and to our peace of mind.
Imagine if these parts had their own sense of performing more extreme roles in our lives than they actually wanted to play. They would be glad to give up some of their responsibilities, if only they felt that they could. To feel free to relax, even just a little, they would want to believe that we no longer needed them to behave in the same old, exhausting ways. And in all honesty, wouldn’t this assessment be absolutely accurate? We really would do fine without all that worry; we might even find ourselves thriving!
Just think: With this understanding, we could negotiate new roles for these long-suffering, worrying parts. They could always return to their old jobs — temporarily — if an experience of anxiety ever really seemed necessary; otherwise, however, they could support us in ways that would leave us feeling much more calm, relaxed, and confident. Perhaps they would want to serve as trusted advisors or consultants, helping us simply to notice what’s around us, and then to consider — rather than fret about — how we want to respond. Freed at last from chronic overwork, liberated from their extreme worrying roles, these parts might celebrate! Wouldn’t you?
What worrying parts of yourself would you like to release? How will you know when you’re ready? How will you proceed?
Featured image credit: nadyatess / 123RF Stock Photo
Scott Kahler, MA, LMFT, CPC, is a psychotherapist, life coach, and clinical supervisor at Thought Tonic, LLC, in Indianapolis, Indiana. He specializes in work with clients who want to experience greater calm, courage, and confidence in their lives.